What do you want?
by mariannesinger16
Summary: Being asexual, and being around people who glorify a woman's body more than anything, (Sanji and Brook) you begin to wonder what love is. And being a thief who's always had to pay someone with money, you begin to wonder why an asexual idiot would love you if not for your wealth or your body.


I am asexual. For as long as I can remember, I have never felt any type of attraction towards a woman's body.

Sanji and Brook always encourage me to spy on Nami or Robin taking bathes with them, but I always turn them down because I never see the point. I only did it one time because I was with my best friend Ussop, and I pretended to have a nosebleed because I didn't want anyone to see what I'm really like.

I'm asexual, so... why am I so desperate to be with my navigator?

I can't tell if she's 'sexy' or not, so I can't tell if I wanna go to the bed with her. But isn't that what love is? Wanting to make love to your soulmate? That's what Sanji always told me. I have no desire to have sex with her, but... I want to be around her. I want to be as close to her as I can more than anyone else I've ever met.

Why, though? She scares me. She's always hitting me, and when we first met, she manipulated me into being a decoy for her. That's right, when we first met she had the option to kill me, but she didn't. I told her that she should be ready to kill when necessary, but I'm very grateful that she chose not to kill me.

Her smile and laugh always make me happy, and it encourages me to do whatever I can to bring to her joy. Her tears always make me angry, and it encourages me to do whatever I can to keep her from melancholy.

Is that enough for me to want to be with her? I want the same thing for all of my friends. And like I said, she's always hitting me, and mostly over stupid things that to me make as little sense as a woman's body, like money. And I let her hit me. Why do I let her hit me?

I'm certainly not happy when she hits me, but for some reason I never really mind her violence. It doesn't hurt, of course, I am rubber. Plus, if she wants to let loose some steam, it'd be better on me than anyone else. It, for some reason pleases, me that she's letting out her anger, like I'm meaning something to her.

I can't take it anymore. I want to see her!

I open the door to the woman's quarters, where Nami's sitting alone.

"Luffy?"

"... Nami," I moan as I slowly walk closer to her.

"What's wrong? Are you hungry?"

"N-Nami, I... I need your help."

"What? What's wrong?"

"Nami," I moan as my eyes start to close. "Hold me..." I grow numb as everything goes black.

* * *

He's lying on my lap while I sit in the chair, unconscious. I have a green blanket over the both of us, and I'm holding him gently trying not to wake him up.

... "Hold me." What does that even mean? Why do want me to hold you?

I realize how abusive I can be towards you and everyone else, but I can't help it. I'm a short-tempered person. I even just draw maps to keep my mind off of my anger so I won't have to hurt anybody. Yet you keep me here.

Not that I mind, I actually really love you. But I don't want to admit it, I don't even wanna think about what Robin would say to me if she knew. And if Sanji-kun finds out, well, there goes my butler.

And now you suddenly want me to hold you. Do you love me, as well? No, you can't.

I can tell you're asexual, it's so obvious. If it's not for my body, then why do you want me to hold you? Why do you want to be with me? Why me, and not someone soft to sleep on like Chopper?

"Nami..."

He slightly opens his eyes and looks up at me.

"What is it?" I ask teasingly with a smirk. "If you wanna sleep on me, then I'll have to charge you seven hundred belis."

"Nami... hold me..."

"You're not the first man to ask me that. If you want me to hold you so badly, we're taking this to the bed."

"No. I don't want to have sex," he says tiredly. "Nami... Be my navigator."

I lose my smile.

"Is that all I'm good for? Navigating this ship for your stupid adventure?"

"No," he says blankly. "I want you around, Nami..."

I'm quiet. There goes my short temper again. I try to keep it, but it's hanging by a thin thread.

"What is it?" I ask. "If it's not sex, then what to you want? I'm nothing but a skankey thief. You're obviously asexual, don't even try to deny it. You don't just want me for my navigation skills, either. And you quite clearly don't care about money. So what is it? What do you want from me!?"

* * *

I realize what it is. I don't want any of the Earthly things she possesses. I want the thing that comes from inside. I want her, not her body, not her money, not her virginity.

"... I want your soul."

She looks down at me with her wide brown eyes wide open, and her pale face bright pink. Her eyes slightly close, but not all the way, and she smiles.

"Luffy..."

Her eyes close completely, and her head falls to her side.

I smile and wrap my arms around her as my consciousness starts to slip as well. I whisper, "Mine..." and everything goes black.


End file.
